Stupid tricks......

Was outside smoking a cig (what’s new?) when it crossed my mind somea the junk I’ve seen in my life… This blog will be a ‘quicky’ – but would love for you to add from what you’ve seen with your eyeballs in life… weird stuff…

My list…….

My fraternity brother (we had an earlier blog on this)… he could literally tie his pee pee in a knot. And no, I don’t have his address or phone number.

Friend… recently turned up all four eyelids (upper and lower) – and they held. Was kinda spooky lookin’.

One-hand clapping. I have a cousin, roughly my age. Bastard can clap with one hand. Weirdest GD thing you ever saw. I’ve tried, can’t. He can. And fast.

Ex inlaws hada hound that would go to front door and bark if he hadta pee… back door and bark if he hadta poop. True. Same hound – whenever they’d put suitcase on bed to pack to leave – uh huh – he’d pee on it.. like “the nerve of you.”

Maryville, MO. Many years ago. Feller I met had been in a car wreck… severely lashed something in his mouth. Destroyed his taste buds.. Cheeseburger, steak, fish, bread, eggs, baked beans, liver & onions.. you name it.. tasted the same.. Beer, water, milk, Vodka, juice, pickle juice, Tabasco… all tasted the same to him. He could get some sorta stupid when he did hard liquor.

Guy in high school could bend his fingers back so they touched his wrist. Ouch. Didn’t hurt him. Hurt me to watch.

Friend could take legs, put the heels back behind her neck… and walk on her butt cheeks.

Vaginal farts. Yes, no typo. Ahm, someone I was with would lay nekkie on bed, flat on back. Raise legs to point where she looked like an “L”… when brought down with force, each and every time, a loud, loud – I’m sorry I have no other term for it than “puddy fart.”... Same chicky could hold her nose, blow, and fluid would come outta her right tear duct. Damn I miss her and her tricks!

Seen any you wanna add? May you get laid with regularity, and may it not be regular. GD forecast looks nice. May we have San Diego? I mean.. it’s May… and we have San Diego weather. High mid-70’s… Low mid-fitties… all week. Take that shit Missouri Gas & Energy… Kiss my ass Aquila… Ya gotta love May. May I? Love, Victurd.