Woah baby lotta good years working for the airlines... I personally helped lead two of 'em into Chapter 7... Not actually, we kept trying to tell our union dude 80% of something is better than 100% of nothing... he musta had those plug thingys in his ears... didn't hear us...
I drew straws to escort Cheryl Ladd (broken leg at the time) from Gate 3 to Gate 7. Lost.
Shook hands and visited at length with Eddie Albert, nice, nice man.
Dom Deluise came thru.. BIG man... saw us in ramp-rat uniforms (fancy for suitcase slinger).. He said "WOW, you guys must be ROUGH... must be TOUGH... you balls must hang down to here"- and dropped his hands to knee level. I'll never forget that!
Most were cool. Some thought they were way cooler than the average Joe. Somehow I guess came outta the womb different, ain't figured it out yet.
I see today a lady passed away three hours into a six hour overseas flight... they moved her from economy class to the vacant first class... put a blanket over her.. strapped her in, propped with pillows.... daughter given seat next to her.. wailing the entire way understandably... this is horrible, but I'm reminded of Weekend At Bernies... due to turbulence, she kept sliding out of seat and onto floor. Is it horrible of me to think that's semi-kinda funny? NO, I wouldn't laugh if it were a loved one!
Just today.. lady tossed from Delta flight for smoking cig in lav.. threatening to hit pilot in chest.. turned it around, took her back...
It takes a thief: some stories stolen once again. Dammit Victor... we'll come see you in jail for plageir... plajireri... plagearis... ahm, saying shit that others have said without gaining their permission. Oh well. Here goes:
Airlines, trying to breakup monontony of travel.. have added little catchy phrases/sayings insteada the same ole same ole....
Pilot upon landing... "WHOA big fella... WHOA!"....
Flight attendant after rough landing.. "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."
"Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."
"In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite."
On an Air New Zealand flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."
Three elderly ladies traveling from Kansas City to Las Vegas.... Customer Service rep checking them in... following procedure.. he was sposedta double check destination with passengers before formally tagging bags... "Now let's see.. three bags for Vegas right?".. In unison, they sternly uttered "Beg your pardon sonny?"...
Snowing like crazy in Kansas City. Even worse in Omaha. Flights cancelling one after the other. Feller in wheelchair trying to get to Omaha. Rolled him to gave 5. Nope, cancelled. Snow in Omaha.... Rolled him to gate 8... Nope, cancelled. Snow in Omaha. No flights landing. He insisted I keep trying.. Our commuter partner had one flight left for day to Omaha... I rolled him down there. Nope, Omaha airport closed. Madder and madder he got... after word of the last possible flight being cancelled finally he threw his arms up in disgust and yelled "I KNEW I shoulda taken Delta." Uh huh, right.
I miss the airline industry. If my GD knees had any cartilage left, I'd work there in a heartbeat. Loveya.. Victurd.
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