A River runs through it....

I don't have a Mark Twain story... To be honest, I've not spent that much time around rivers - but that doesn't mean there isn't a fascination, appreciation for rivers.. When I carried mail in Kansas City, KS in the early 90's - I remember seeing designated marks on the buildings WAY UP THERE - and they were labeled "Flood of 1951".... The oldtimers remembered it as if it was yesterday...

My memory of the 1993 flood ain't so great... I remember levees with water up to the tippy tops... I remember adjacent roads/bridges closed down.. and a drive across town took some thought/planning....

Isn't always the fury of a river... it's too the serenity.... Played softball in Lexington, MO.... was admittedly a rinky-dink tournament (our favorite) - and insteada a fence in leftfield - there was unrolled toilet paper strung across poles to designate the home run fence... Just on the other side of the 'fence' was the Mighty Mo. Peaceful -and these folks lived it every day... Nice...

En route home from an American Legion Baseball game in Chillicothe, MO.. A couple of beers and the enticement of the Grand River led four lads to abandon their car and swim and dive off the bridge into the sandy bottom river below...

Circa 1974... La Benite Park.. a cheesy little park just South of Liberty right up agin the banks of the Muddy Mo... Was 10pm-ish... Fourteen fraternity brothers (ages 18 to 20, maybe one or two 21's in the group) celebrating something.. hell, I don't remember.. it didn't take much of anything for cause to celebrate... Headlights coming... Oh shit... Spotlight on us... "QUICK, THROW THE BEER IN THE RIVER".. We musta lost some four cases of beer.... Can't remember the going flavor of the time... Probably Oly... Anyways, local cops get out.. "LINE UP HERE." Of course we obliged.. scared shitless we were going to slammer.. "HOW OLD ARE YOU?"... "ahm... 21 sir."... AND YOU?.... "ah, 22 sir".. NEXT? "I'm 21 sir." and so on and so forth down the line - and of course everyone was 21.... after 14th brother was questioned... Fat cop A looked at fat cop B, and then back at us... "WELL HELL... WHADDYA THROWING AWAY ALL THAT GOOD BEER FOR?!!!... and away the fat-kneeslappers went... Yes, spose we earned that....

Onea my dreams prior to my ashes bein' spread is for my son and my stepson and I to build a raft... get on that sucker (The Missouri River) in Kansas City... eat, drink and be merry... and get offa it in St. Louis.. I think it'd be a blast... and very much needed by our threesome... Spose only time will tell...

The Big River, Byrnes Mill... St. Louie, MO (Kinda sorta)... Heaven, pure heaven. My cousins converted an old grist mill into their home/haven... and there is a humongous deck all the way around the mill where one can sit in a lawn chair amongst the dogwoods coming up thru the concrete deck... and peacefully pass the time away... Cousin blocked off parta the river piece by piece, and manually extended the 4 foot damn all the way across the river. Their last name should be Kodak, honest. They bought the old bridge from the city (road was shutdown) for a dollar... and now it's fodder for cousins jumping off on Father's Day (even us old farts)... I treasure every year I get to go - for one knows not when the day will come we won't have the Big River/Byrnes Mill to go to... Words can't describe it - but it's onea natures closest things to sex..

Niangua, Current, Jack's Fork, North Fork, etc... Thanks for the memories... Some that stick out... one year we had an uneven number of floaters... one dude, rather hefty dude, was alone for the trek... he had a kickass crash into boulders.. and his canoe now looked something like an "L" insteada a straight "I".. to watch him navigate the remainder of the way was so GD funny.. but I kinda felt sorry for him... I remember first time I ever went.. "Ha.. I got this crap down.." Had my cigs for the weekend nicely stowed in a mason jar.. sealed tight... uh huh, first capsize.. gone... I remember whatshername - the Current had flooded only weeks earlier... leaves from the flood adorned the trees twelve feet above.. we capsized.. the water was frigid... I really think she mighta died had she not grabbed a tree limb as she passed by.. she could not breathe the water was so cold... And of course Mr. Sanford... around a curve, thought it was a safe place to takea crap.. Lo and behold a group of young punks riding on rubber rafts we'd bantered with up river... they laughed their asses off to see Sanford bent over pooping on the bank.. "YOU SHUT YOUR ASSES UP OR I'LL GO GET MY GD DARTS!"... hehe... one minute of my life I will never, ever forget (unless I pee my pants and forget my name.) Float trips, great times, great friends, great views...

Tryst Falls... 'river' is pushing it.. but it flows.. and there's like a 12 foot waterfall.. We'd invite other Sigma Nu fraternities from small colleges to our softball tourneys at the small field beside.. By the enda the day - no one gave a shit about softball.. and we all huddled around the falls... sharing cold ones.. (I know there are patterns to my life eh?)... Another moment I'll never forget.. Buddy "Lew" jumping off falls.. I was around the corner... some five-ten minutes later they were carrying him to car... off to hospital.. behind a sun/alcohol mixed smile - and a big ole shit eatin' grin Lew looks up at me proudly, smiling and says "Vic, I broke my ankle" and laughed and laughed and laughed...

Rivers are wonderful... I could sit and watch for hours.. I likes all sizes... all speeds.. all kindsa lays of the lands... A part of life that some live daily... others of us rarely... but when we do it's special... I wonder if river rats eventually take it for granted... Cry me a river... Moon river... Bridge over troubled water... Blue Bayou... Michael row the boat ashore... Proud Mary.. Take me to the river... Up on cripple creek... Me hopes u enjoy rivers... I know I do... Happy happy, Victurd