Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Quilting.....

Business section today, KC Star. “Now open”.. I dida double take. Doggie Style Bowtique. Uh huh, ain’t kiddin’. 1503 Westport Road. Wonder if they have a front door? Victor, you’re sick. Uh huh. Am. What’d they say.. “pervert”? AM NOT. ARE TOO. Ok, you win.

Didn’t see the show (Dancing with the Stars), but understand that Heather chick did a backflip last night. Understand it wasn’t half bad. Victor, you’re really really sick. Uh huh. Am. Will ya still need me, will you still feed me.. when I'm 64.

Car broke down at 133rd and State Line… which is, per capita, probably the ritziest parta ‘Kansas City’. Needed an alternator. Ever try to find an auto parts store in Blingville? They just ain’t got ‘em. “There’s someone who can do that.” I overhear that at work here a lot. “There’s someone who can do that.” Ain’t real sure I could fart thru silk… but I’d much rather find “someone who can do that” than repair my own car. Maybe when I retire at age 107 I will.

Yesterday… at work - working on something here at the computer. Lady asks me “do you have it up yet?”… “Kinda personal don’tya think?”… She ran. Redfaced. Tis Ok, she earned it!

Lunch circle talk today: “Ever since they switched my birth control pills I’ve been starving.” Which prompted some pervert to ask “for?”… He was labeled ‘dirty old man.’ Is there sucha thing as a dirty young man? A dirty woman? I seeya shaking your head no.. huh uh, don’t believe it. WHY IS IT ALWAYS THE OLD MAN THAT’S DIRTY. Now I’m overwhelmed… worried. From spending oodles of time at that lunch table, I KNOW there are some dirty old/young women.

Feller in Washington State arrested and charged with stealing over 93 lbs of women’s undies. “I have a problem” he told police. Uh huh. Pervert. DEFINITELY ARE.

Dead guy calls in sick. Lady in Jersey, supposedly having an affair with her boss… supposedly killed her husband and stuffed his remains in three suitcases.. the morning he was killed… she took his laptop and emailed his bosses saying he would be out sick. Her hubby worked on email servers… she sent to a wrong address. Cops added up 2 and 2 as 4. A shame, she’s heap pretty lady. Got her own website in her defense. “He’s once…. Twice… Three times a gentleman”…

It is gorgeous outside. But Victor, I’m reading this in November of 2008. Describe your March 27, 2007 gorgeous? No coat. Low 70’s. Sunny sky, noisy geese. No wind. Perfect. (Don’t get excited though… remember the April Fool’s Day snowstorm years ago?.. uh huh.. I went over an embankment (Down the Kuu-Kuu hill for you Libertyites).. nuther car followed my tracks, bashed the rear of my cool ole T-Bird. $198 in damage. Old man bought rubber mallet (I was 16 I think) for $4, pounded it out.. and pocketed $194!!!

Ok, getting’ the hell outta here. If there’s anything unusual you’ve heard of late – please do not comment. Please keep it a secret. Who would want fun? You shits you (said with love.) Gimme weird stories – I’d loveta hear!

Happy gorgeous day… Not only weather.. but I ain’t been overwhelmed or worried all day. Hope the same for you. Toodles – love, Victurd.

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