Skeery thought ain’t it. “That wrinkly ole bastard at age fitty-six, I bet even his boobies are down ’round his naval. “
Hi. Howareya. Whereareya. Whatsnew in your world. I ain’t gotta lot to add… Been on the treadmill of life of late. Kinda monotonous, not a lotta change.
Going forward, but mebbe not exactly with compass.
Funny. To me anyways. Had someone walked up to me (or you) in High School and said “the next ___ years of your life… well.. Here’s what’s gonna happen”….
No way you rotten bastard! My mom won’t die at age 66... You asshole, I won’t lose my sister at age 51.. And I will be the only one left in my nuclear family in 2003? I friggin HATE divorce… are you telling me by age 53 I will have been divorced TWICE?.. Patooey, nope, not gonna believe it.
Weird how life happens. Stop. Quit reading. Rethink you’re life. Close your eyes. Picture that dude telling you the exact same thing. Huh uh. You gotta be shitting me? That CAN’T have happened.
Well… bottomline, what’s happened has happened. There ain’t a lot we can do about death. There’s little (now) we can do about divorce. Perhaps our bodies have changed. We’re there now, we “am’s what we am’s”…
You really mean I won’t have my first kid until I’m 32? Yessir, that’s how I see it. Will I really work for two airlines that go bankrupt? Uh huh.
You have GOT to be kidding me.. . Did you really say I will drive from Kansas City to Biloxi, MS to meet some gal I met online for a weekend? Yep. Remember? You got your first (STOP YOU ASSHOLE!!! This is PUBLISHED FOR ANYONE, EVERYONE!)….
For real? By age fitty-six I will have had TWELVE pets come and go? One of my closest friends will fall while stocking a grocery shelf at age 52 and die? No friggin way, I hate your guts prognosticator.
We could walk into the HS today… imagine things for the HS seniors that were gonna happen in their lives… and have the same shocking results…
Life doesn’t seem to be always Pollyanna, two-car garage, two kids (both degreed), longterm marriage, healthy 401K’s.. parents doing well into their 90’s… brothers/sisters fine, just fine.
We’re jolted. All of us. There’s no GPS for life. It ain’t scripted. There is no rewind, Tivo, Back to the Future.
We deal wit’ it.
Even u sumbitches in your 20’s that occasionally walk by here.. You can already tell… adaptation.. “This ain’t how I thought it’d be”…
And it ain’t.
Running back, when carrying the ball, and are about to be hit by a linebacker, they spin. Basketball players, when they go up to shoot a jumpshot, realize the dude guarding them is like 6 inches taller, somehow peripherally see a teammate to pass to.
Job loss. We make a new resume. Family loss. We mourn, we (kinda sorta) heal. Mate loss (be it divorce or death, or wish they woulda died) we make it through the molasses of recovery.
I wish I woulda been a switchhitter. NO, NO you preverts. I don’t mean “hehe… look at that limp-wrist, he swings both ways”.. I mean when life’s challenges bring on a lefthanded pitcher, I wish I had the propensity to go from batting lefthanded, to the other sidea the box and bat right.
Again, we’re left to deal wit’ it… Whatever IT is. Is it lack of self esteem, and if so, WHY? Is it lack of having a mate? And if so, this one’s a little heavier. Do I really want one? Am I really ready for one? I go #2 and don’t turn on the fan, would that bug her? Hehe.
As we progress in age, life likens a jigsaw puzzle. When we’re in first grade, seven pieces are connected and that sucker is done. Finished. Finito. Or… “FIRST!”…
Age a bit.. 500 pieces.. A little harder… yet still a gimme…
Bonified old fart.. The pieces are so GD small… we lose them… spend halfa the month of October piecing it together.. Finish… ‘cepting for those three glaring pieces that simply ain’t there.. We turn over every sofa, loveseat, chair… pull the dresser out.. Get down on our hands/knees… scour.. Say to ourselves “This shit (hands/knees) ain’t as easy as it usedta be… I think the puzzle will just have to be incomplete.”
And we arrive. That point. This sumbitch ain’t done, but it’s still incomplete. Do we regret the puzzles were so much easier at a younger age? Not no, but hells no’s… We get out the spray varnish, plaster them muther-dubbers, put ‘em away wherever we keep the other important stuff we put away.
Is it OVER because there’s a few pieces missing? Again. Not no’s, but hells no’s... I happened to believe, and it’s what keeps me going “It’s my belief I’ve yet to have the best piece I’ve ever had.” Victor? Were you at the bar tonight? You usedta say what kept you going is the belief “It’s my belief I’ve yet to be in the best relationship I’ve ever had.”
Oh yeah, mebbe you’re right. I think I did say that. May I ask though… am I ‘a “for certain” headed to hell if I did believe/want/dream of statement #1?… No Victor, I guess that’s ok, for a piece anyways…
So whatinthehell does this mumbo-jumbo blog mean? How can we make any sense of this chit?
Aha. Finally. You got it. You can’t. Life’s about rolling with the punches. It’s about dealing with Plan B (And C, D, E)… It’s about “seeing” when blindsided. It’s about liking one’s self even if you eat too much.. Drink too much… smoke too much… fret too much.. Hermit too much… extrovert too much… whatever too much…
Life happens. And it never happens on pattern. It’s sad, happy, fun, shitty, windy, rainy, snowy, cold, hot, sweaty, fast, slow, long, short, up, down, trying, easy… whatever.
Just know… no matta the way your life is going… my life is going… we can enjoy this shit.
I useda coach… The singular most important role of a coach is… to do his best to put his/her team in a position to be successful…
Victor, are you gonna gloat on that shit and say your blog is doing “just that” today?
No Mr. Halitosis, I’m not. We’re never prepared. So mebbe.. Just mebbe.. Knowing that, we kinda-sorta somehow can be.
Driving home tonight.. Opposite lane. Interstate. Flashing red lights. Some 50 yards off the interstate, crashed up agin a fence… roof of car looked like maybe it’d flipped… In nano-seconds, the lives of these folks probably change. We just never know. We can never be prepared.
If we simply know “change can occur”… and “it doesn’t always go like we think it will”… mebbe, just mebbe, we put ourselves in a little greater position for success… and to me, the definition of success is to live happy.
Loveya, thanks for being here. If you haven’t had sex in six months, call me.. 867-5309.. I’ll bring the massage oil. Love, Victurd.
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