If you could be anywhere in the world at this very moment… where would it be? I think I’d be at North Redington Beach, FL. In between Clearwater and St. Pete - yes, touristy, but so serene, calm. This time of year, the final days of the lingering winter that simply won’t go away - is mindful of waking up in the morning with yukky breath. There’s no way to combat that feel from happening - so we venture on until spring brushes our palate fresh….
At times I wish I were my cat… Jackson.. He’s laid back - yet talks to let you know what he wants (when he wants it).. This very moment.. There’s a tarp in the kitchen (remember, used it to keep the rain offa me when I changed the brakes - “I’ll put it away… sometime.”).. and that tarp is right by the sliding glass doors… with the combination of the furnace providing 68 degrees inside - and the solar heat radiating to the vivid orange tarp - Jackson is neatly supplanted under a crevice of the tarp - 99% covered up… u can see his watchful eye peering if you look closely… he’s saying “leave me the hell alone, I’m warm, I’m comfy, I’m not ‘bothered’, I came here to get away from you, now you‘re here, what sup with that?.” I feel like that upon occasion - and here lately, more and more.
I want to “want” tomorrow - versus waking up dreading today.. Victor, is this another pity party? Eh, mebbe. With the good comes the bad… with the wonderful meal comes the tab.. With the mate comes the end.. When the jukebox stops, more quarters are needed.. Right now I’m dealing with some extremely difficult times - with a sometimes very difficult person - whose view of helping himself is tremendously distorted, and basically non-existent.
I’d love to be able to leave a note indicating to someone “gone to the grocery store..”.. I’d love for the trip to clean the car take half as long - and have it be done with company. I’d love to dine at a restaurant and “person watch” insteada “people watch.” Victor, are you saying you’re lonely? Yes, I guess I am. I don’t view that as all bad - because in spite of “the ends” - I want that again. I don’t know if I ever took that feel for granted - but I know I positively never will again.
I know “it happens when you least expect it” - but I don’t think, due to situations, it’s due to happen soon. This too shall pass.. In the meantime, I hear the roar of the furnace.. I awaken with the yukky breath.. I am envious (but happy for) those I see sharing life. It just ain’t the time right now. I must make it through this ‘winter’.
So… back to trying to figure out Rubik’s “Professor’s Cube.” The standard Rubik’s cube has 3 rows of 3 (9 panels facing you that you must line up)… The Professor’s Cube has 5 rows of 5 (25 panels facing to figure out.).. Snowflakes, children, the opposite sex, Rubik’s varieties - are different - some harder than others to solve. Some harder than others to peacefully coexist. Frustrating even, upon occasion.
I don’t seek ‘the orgasm of all orgasms’.. I understand I don’t need perfection… I simply strive for progression - and at present there are simply too many colors on the face of the 25 panel Professor. The windshield still needs scraping in the morning.. I eek, versus jump, outta bed. Ewww that’s a yukky taste.
But - stay tuned. Mebbe ur life is topsy-turvy. Maybe you’re in a turvy mode. Maybe the colors ain’t lining up quite right no matter how you twist things.. This too shall pass.. Robins will come.. The day of wearing shorts ain’t far.. A float trip.. A spin in the country.. A walk in the park.. They’re around the corner..
God Bless all people.. To me there ain’t no such thing as “bad people and good people” - there’s a little of both in each of us.. Some, no matter which way they turn Rubik, can’t get the good to be exposed. We must never put the cube down for good in frustration. We must continue to try to solve - make it more aesthetically perfect. For it’s own good.
Love, Victurd.
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