I have absolutely nothing to say…..

Then Victor, why are you here? Well, I rectum it’s my duty, my job. It’s expected.

To that Victor I’d say why, your not paid, and who expects?

Yeah, good point. I just don’t know what to talk about though. Seen ‘em at work. Them ones that – no matter what – they’ll talk. I’m a drifter. When someone that talks all the time starts in on it, I drift. Politely, but I do. They’re kinda like “it’s all about me.”

Then Victor, even more ammo for you to not be here, keep your fingers offa the keyboard.

I spose, but again – a duty. Tootie fruity, oh Rudy.

I’d love to have a hound again. I’m a hound kinda guy. I’d love to have a woman again, I’m a woman havin’ kinda guy. I’d love to haves me a pickemup truck, I’m a pickemup truck kinda guy. I want what I want and I wants it now. Hehe. I’d likes me an older house with a shade treed yard. Kinda-sorta so far from Gladys Kravats types I could get the morning paper in my undies. I’d likea work with the public – banter back and forth with customers. There’s nothing better than someone handing you money and then having THEM say “thank you.”

We all gots wants. If they were needs – then we couldn’t live without ‘em eh? Let’s just say – it’s tougher to live without the needs you want. In my best Scooby-doo impersonation “Rrrhuh?”.. It is. When you have things you want, you tend to need ‘em. Therefore, ya get the shakes. Ya salivate like a Pavlov dog when ya see a nifty pickemup truck. Nice booty. Summer cottage in the country.

Wishin’ and hopin’ and thinkin’ and prayin’. You tell ‘em Dusty, I’ll pat ma feet.

Life is like going into the dime store as a kid. I want that. And that. And that. S’morea that. Onea these. Four of those. A bigger bag to carry it all. A room edition so I’ve got a place to put all this crap. Might I have this whole aisle?

Then reality sets in. Mom says “no.” Or, you realize – at present – you can’t afford buying a truck. Dating is expensive, even armed with a nifty (impress the hell outta ‘em) Entertainment book. My house is kinda like onea them perilously sitting on a mudslide on the West Coast. Admitted past situational depression, along with lacka funds – finds now all kindsa ‘good’ chit needsa fixin. So, bye bye shade tree in the country idea.

Lightbulb. Ding. Idea. “Rrrhuh?”..

I’m departing now. Victor, you really talked a hella lot for not having anything to say. Yeah, I rectum. Spose it’s all about me huh? I’ve decided – I am going to go seek: a pickup driving momma, dog lover that lives in the country and owns her own retail store. That way I’d have it all. The pickemup, the woman, the job greeting the public, and I could pee by the mailbox and no one would ever know. I needs me that.

Wishin’ and hopin’ and thinkin’ and prayin’ All you gotta do is
Hold her and kiss her and squeeze her and love her - Yeah, just do it and after you do, you will be hers.. You will be hers. You will be hers.. Bye bye, (with love) Needturd.