GD rain….
7:34pm… 5/27/07... Sitting at the PC (What’s new?!!)… a (roughly) 4 ft, by 8 ft section of the ceiling came “tumble’n down”…. Yes.. It partially landed atop me… I’m ok… and… fully capable of looking up attorneys in the Yeller Pages…
I’ve decided to sue: My ex sister-inlaw (bought the house from her)… the National Gypsum Company (They made the shitty sheetrock)… GAF Materials Corp (they made the shingles)…
ReMax (surely they sold this house at one time… don’t they sell everything?)… Harley Davidson (I know.. This sounds roundabout.. But mebbe had she not rode off on one.. there’d been sufficient funds [two incomes] to pay 12 illegal aliens to re-roof this sucker in no time.)…
Nah… all one can do is laugh… and I did… It’s been leaking.. I went to Lumber Yard today.. I thought they closed at 6pm…. Go there at 4:50... Here this announcement “we’re closing in ten minutes… please bring all purchases to the counter at this time”… SHIT, I hadn’t even found the roof fixer upper products… So…. Even though I’d already done my 30 minutes on the elliptical machine… I - RAN… ailse to aisle…
Finally found the goop to repair roof… huffed and puffed my way up to counter… Feller in fronta me was bitching/moaning at poor (mebbe Jr in HS) clerk… “YOUR AD IS MISLEADING… ON THE TV, IT SOUNDED LIKE EVERYTHING IS 20% OFF THE ENTIRE MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND.” “I’m sorry sir.. I just work here twelve hours a week when I ain’t practicing’ sports… trying to get enough money saved up to take Jenny to the Drive In this summer so we can make out in my ‘87 Caprice.” He didn’t say that, but I thought it, and.. He probably did too.. Like this poor kid had anything to do with that…
So………….. I go home, read the ‘structions…. “after you put this goop down, place the adhesive cloth down.. And then add another layer of this goop for best results.” Shit. I didn’t buy the adhesive cloth… I’m adding Sutherland Lumber to the list of folks I’m suing…
So.. To heighten the mood… I went to you tube.com and listened to Dee Clark’s “Raindrops falling from my eyes”… and then BJ Thomas’s “Raindrops keep falling from on my head.”.. and then… The Temptations (my alltime fav group.. The dead guys.. Not the new guys) “I wish it would rain.”
(Oh, and I forgot Owens-Corning.. There’s asbestos shit allover the place here.)
Justa day in the life… I bet you GD (gosh darn) women wished this upon me for talking about women drivers yesterday. You bitches!
Sooooooooooo… tomorrow… I climb the ladder… spread this god-awful black gooey stuff on the places that leak…. And then mebbe next weekend I’ll mess with the sheetrock… and then mebbe late June I’ll figure out a way to get it to where it matches the resta the textured ceiling…
Ya gotta admit, it is an interesting life I lead… I canardly wait to see what happens tomorrow…. Could my bank account possibly be overdrawn due to those malicious bastards in the IT department at work obtaining my login/password?… Could I go to the gym to piddle on the elliptical machine shortly after the water aerobics class lets out? (To make a short story long, when I first separated… and my head was finally semi-screwed on straight… I bought a one year membership to our wonderful Community Center… I excitedly threw on my spiffy workout attire… splashed some expensive cologne on… with (spandex) baited anticipation - I drove to workout.. All was great… did my workout.. Went to sauna.. YES, YES.. This is going well… Can’t WAIT to get in Jacuzzi… finally.. Done… to Jacuzzi…. Shortly followed by four 70-somethings that had just gotten out of water aerobics class… Oh well… I’ll find her… one day.)
Where was I? Oh yeah, suing/roof patching…. Ok… All is cool.. Again, I remember the folks in Kansas whose homes were blown completely away… I remember the feller sleeping under the bridge at the downtown I-35 loop… I remember all the problems around the world.. And the long story I read in today’s KC Star about the men and women that didn’t come home from Iraq.. And the affect on their families…
Ya gotta just laugh (at the roof)… and I do… and am…
As I climb up and down the ladder tomorrow… I be hopin’ the ups and downs of your life are managed well by you… Life can’t rain on my parade…
Happy Memorial Day to you… While I won’t be visiting my folks, sister’s graves… I do think about them… I hope you spend this day to think about all you loved that are no longer around… I (and I’m sure you too) do that daily anyways… but it’s great we gotta designated day to formally do so… Love, Victurd.
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