Do you like yourself?

Oh there are days... Yesterday - five minutes into the work day I got into baby spat over the phone with a co-worker - infected my whole day. I was kinda joking around teasing - then she "mean-teased" back and it pissed me off. I allowed it to affect my demeanor thru lunch...

After lunch - I made a brief apology - and frankly it didn't really come from the heart - but I get sea-sick when the boat rocks... Similar thing happened a few weeks ago with an email I sent... A person one step up wrote back "are you asking or are you telling?" - that got me bent outta shape a bit - and I winged back a nice email (honestly) hoping to explain what I meant - and was met with "wow, you can dish it out but you can't take it" - so... I'm left to wonder about myself.. I re-read what I sent and it didn't seem 'sharp' - so I dunno, different views from different shoes I guess.

Today I get to work early and there's a Thank You card infronta me.. I won't embarrass her - but it's from a gal I work in close proximity to.. She's basically telling me how lucky she is to work with me, my patience with her... Jeez! Those damn givers! Seriously, her timing couldn't have been better - I ain't real sure what I did to 'earn' it - but I'm so thankful to have received it... I gotta start this giving stuff -- she musta felt sooo good to place that on my keyboard - knowing it would pump me up - and it has.. Why is it you see people around you, you admire them - their personality, how they handle stressy times with a smile -- and then they turn around and compliment you? She rocks - I'm lucky to work with someone so upbeat - and I will tell her I feel that way. (Ceptin' it's easier for me to write than it is to say stuff like that - shouldn't be - but it is.)

Perhaps boring you - there have been periods of my life, days of my life where I've been depressed. Maybe we all suffer that? There have been days where I question the depth of my personality - and ask the basic questions "Am I a good person?... Do I like me?" -- sometimes my internal jury stays out for awhile...

The men don't cry part... Any reading ladies please don't slap me when I write this next part... It's long been thought by men that it's the woman who will experience a day where just for no reason she will feel like beginning to cry. (Close your ears, and I ain't gay) I had onea them days yesterday. Unexplainable. Life's like the stock market. The inflatable raft. The rollercoaster.

Mosta the time I feel like I'm ontopa the mountain and I wanna yodel (and I don't know how to yodel) but there are valley days where all I want is a blanket, darkness and quiet. Ya think that's normal?

Do I need to sign up for Nurse Wratchett's watch? Do you 'self-evaluate' yourself? If you occasionally don't live up to your own standards - whaddya do? On the days you feel good about yourself - whaddya do?

I'z just curious. We all have eyes, ears, arms, legs, toes, fingers, a butt, etc - but the brain is sucha neat thing in how it's composed similar - yet so different from one to the next. Please - lemme know what's in your brain. Be anonymous if you want.. I find this therapeutic. Better thana massage. Blowjob may be pushing it (VICTOR DAMMIT YOUR NIECES MIGHT BE READING).. Oh yeah, sorry. Anyways - doggone it "speak"~! Happy day, bye bye now.