Rubber trucky, you’re the one…….

Rubber Trucky,
you're the one,
You make bathtime lots of fun,
Rubber Trucky,
I'm awfully fond of you;
(woh woh, bee doh!)

Breaking news… Stolen in Mexico City… Tractor trailer promoting HIV/AIDS awareness… Contents within the truck: 5,000 rubbers… 800 HIV test kits… not to mention a 23’ blow up prophylactic…

Rubber Trucky, joy of joys,
When I squeeze you, you make noise!
Rubber Trucky,
You're my very best friend, it's true!
(doo doo doo doooo, doo doo)

The coordinator of an HIV/AIDS awareness tour, Polo Gomez, said the truck was taken Sunday from its parking spot in front of a friend's house in Mexico City….

Hey, I’ve got an idea Polo… Grab your buddy Marco… You and he each grab three quarters… Oh, sorry… forgot the exchange thingy…. Ahem… If you’d each grab 8.408 Pesos, stand 100 yards apart or so… clang the coins… and yell… “MARCO…. POLO… MARCO… POLO…” Mebbe, just mebbe, rubber trucky would show up… (All-ee all-ee in free)…

Every day when I make my to the tubby
I find a little fella who's
Cute and yellow and chubby
(rub-a-dub-a-dubby!)

What do you do with 365 used rubbers?… Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Ok, this is getting serious compadre.. We’ve gots to find these rubbers. They’d have to have been stolen by men (pardon me, Senior’s)… so… if you semen driving down the road in “Rubber Truck” (It features painted images of a peeled banana, the exposed part shaped like a condom, and a shirtless man saying: "I protect myself. Do you?")… call 9-1-1.. NO, WAIT.. Dial nueve-uno-uno… The Policia will be there pronto… ARREST THE LITTLE SQUIRTS!



Rubber Trucky, you're so fine
And I'm lucky that you're mine
Rubber ducky, I'm awfully fond of you.

Ok, I just got out my calculator. If I were to have stolen this tractor trailer.. And based upon the mathematic formula of “how it’s been going” the last few years… I’ve ‘ciphered I’m “good” until the age of 1156 years of age before I’d ever haveta purchase a “no glove/no love” again. You perverts may get your calculators out…En su marca, es puesto, es ido (on your mark, get set, go!)

Every day when I make my to the tubby
I find a little fella who's
Cute and yellow and chubby
(rub-a-dub-a-dubby!)

WAIT! WHAT? S’more breaking news? They found the truck? MINUS the 5,000 rubbers? Hehe, even if those dudes are prolific, say, two of them, once a day… they’re good until roughly 2015... Eso es mucho sexo (That’s a lot of sex!)

Rubber Trucky, you're so fine
And I'm lucky that you're mine
Rubber trucky, I'm awfully fond of -
Rubber trucky, I'd like a whole pond of -
Rubber trucky I'm awfully fond of you!
(doo doo, be doo.)

So, close your ears, we’ve come to the end of this rubber dilemma… We’ve witnessed the rubber match. (Another stupid joke [close your ears] “do you know what’s inscribed on the very end of a rubber after you’ve unrolled it all the way?”… me neither, I’ve never unrolled one all the way.)

I’ve just decided… I’m too old for this stuff.

Eh, I saw the article, it kinda intrigued me, so I wrote. Sorry. Come again, wouldya?

Love, Victurd