Open mouth, insert snowshoe.....

$194.00

Ok alright already.. I goofed.. Welcome to Spring. Today is March 20th, 2006. A Fool's Gold week of wonderful temperatures led me to dream, beg, want, spout, believe Spring was around the corner.. Mother Nature had other ideas. Just like a woman! "It's not nice to fool Mother Nature." Now you hens out there (said with love).. doesn't that sound like something a woman would say?

Today's forecast calls for miserable rain/sleet mix turning to snow - and anywhere from 6" to 15" in our area. Yippee. Typical responses would be: "well, we've been real lucky this year - and in recent years, perhaps we're due." SCREW THAT! Gimme St. Petersburg's forecast... I want Clearwater's sunshine.. Instead, I have to go buy another gallon of damned anti-freeze because my radiators a leakin' again (checkenginelight) and I've been pouring straight water in it..

April Fools Day, 1970. An early spring 'winter' storm provided 9" of snow. One less school day for this high school senior. Took ma pappy's ole T-Bird out and about - "knew what I was doing" and proceeded to slide down an embankment (have I heard that before?) only to rest in the parking lot of the Koo-Koo (<-- hamburger joint, heap big kid hangout in high school).

Much to my chagrin, I'd made wonderful tire tracks in the snow - and an older gent (an OLD sum'bitch probably at LEAST 50) followed my tire tracks and slid down the hill coming to a crashing thud with the bumper of the ole T-Bird.

"Ahm, dad... remember when I told you Iknowwhatinthehell I'm doing out here driving?"

So.... $198 worth of damage.. Old fart's insurance paid it.. Dad bought a $4 rubber mallot... pounded it out.. $194. He made $194 off my slide down the embankment.

If it's any consolation today, they say "the last snowstorm of the year is THE BEST time to put out grass seed." Some help. I want bikini's in the grocery store. Convertibles in February. I can deal with the sand. (Screw you, the bugs/heat/humidity/New Yohhrkers too)..

Bye bye now.