Cracklin' Rosie........

I've always been a tightass when it comes to purchasing records... I mean 8 tracks... I mean cassettes... ahem, CD's... I really really have to like a band to buy one - or, I have to catch a bigass sale somewhere (Fancy for "I shop Garage Sales")......

I ain't never put a quarter in a juke box and punched in a Neil Diamond song... Not that I don't like him - I do.. My ears just don't crave his stuff.. Yes, I'm certain I've cranked a song or two of his before.. I sing that "You don't bring me flowers" thing to a coworker the next time I see them after we've had a baby tiff..

I got to go see Neil live not long ago... I wasn't drug there (nor did I do drugs there) - and I won't embarrass myself and tell you the last concert I went to... but I went... "Geez Louise where'd all these old people come from?"

It was really, really quite spectacular... I think the last concert all they did was have some gussied up fella come make an introduction(probably the promoter, or maybe some radio jockey who ran out and made us better understand why he'd chosen radio over something visual)... Not Neil... He had a bigass circular stage... Up thru the stage arose a drummer on a pedastol... then another drummer.. Ya wonder if they were smoking dope down there beneath the stage?... "Whereinthehell did all these old people come from?"...

Pretty soon a keyboard man with his piano rose up from the earth.. then an organist... followed closely by a sax... and a trumpeter... aha... there's two guitar players.. Neil? Is that you?... Nope.. not yet.. Then a female "do-wop" singer... and another.. and another... Hell, this is gettin' better than bein' at a Chiefs game singing the National Anthem and ending it with the hearty crowd inserting "and the hooooome of theeeeeee CHIEFFFFFFSSSSS!".....

There were twleve of 'em I think up and a tootin'... Then finally Neil runs out from behind the stage.. Two widescreens zoomed in on him (These suckers were HUGE, bigger than the '68 Studabaker I once owned)..... "Would you look at all the GD (gosh darn) old people here?"

I have a new appreciation for Neil... When going out to get the morning newspaper winds me - I sat amazed as he went for almost three hours non-stop - runnin' all around the damn stage with the spirit and the pep of a 25 year old. (NO DAMMIT, I didn't say he LOOKED 25... He MOVED 25.) "Look at all these damn old people dancing in the aisles!"

The whole damn thing almost made me wanna run to Blockbuster and rent "The Jazz Singer"... I was thoroughly entertained as were the five kind folks I got to go with... I always thought the Monkees wrote that damn "Daydream Believer" but they musta stole it from Neil because he played all his old.. I mean, all his stuff we usedta listen to... "Did you see all the silver haired folks there?"

We parked fairly far away... and followed the other o.. ahm other people out.. A fine evening in my life... Exceptin' for all those damn old people.. Hell, I think most of 'em probably listened to him in the 60's... Geez Louise.... Cracklin' Rosie get onboard...