Living with gonorrhea….

MADE YA LOOK!

No, don’t think I have it, but… the point being… you’re here.. Gotcha!

Normalcy.. There.. How’s that for a topic?

Is there sucha thing? Webster says “the state or fact of being normal.”

That doesn’t really tell you shit, and I hate when a word is defined with some form of the word itself… So, what’s ‘normal’?

American Heritage jumps in with “Conforming with, adhering to, or constituting a norm, standard, pattern, level, or type; typical: normal room temperature; one's normal weight; normal diplomatic relations.”

I don’t really like that shit either. You stand in line at McDonalds. Dude next toya don’t look normal, but for him, mebbe the exact opposite is true… Neither ofya are conforming to squat. Neither ofya are adhering to anything. Neither constitutes a norm - except to the normalcy of our own lives.

You don’t have to walk very far to notice distinct differences in normalcy.

Closing my eyes, thinking of ten different people I’ve been around in the last week:

1) 19 year marriage. HATE IT. Want out. Stuck. Control. No car. No funds. Do this don’t do that can’t you read the signs. Leap and possibly give up 16 and 17 yr old’s love? I don’t think so. Normal for her. Daily. Sad, but normal.

2) Life is WONDERFUL. I appreciate EVERY moment. I spent 8 years in prison for Meth. I won’t go back there. I’m alive. I’m free. I can be with my family. I’m making up for lost time. I’ve learned. I sooooo appreciate the “now” normal.

3) My wife and I have separate bedrooms. The intimacy stopped long ago. She claimed she is being forced to work from 8pm to 8am this coming Saturday - but I don’t have the heart to drive by her work and look for her car. Tis his “normal” life.

4) My husband drinks excessively every night. He’s a good man and this is his only fault. He’s a good father, is nice to me - and this is his only fault - so now it’s normal.

5) My husband thinks it’s hot that other men are attracted to me. We go out, and he encourages me to be flirtatious, to dance, to rub, to push the envelope but not seal it. Their normalcy.

6) I have a unique life. My husband and I are raising my kids, and in addition, we’ve adopted some - and it’s awesome. I live my life, as does my husband, for our kids. Normal to us. Editor’s note: This fucking rocks.

7). I am president of a family owned company. People say I’m impatient, pushy, ask for answers to trivial things within the workforce and that I’m strongly persist until I get an answer. It’s all I know. It’s my normalcy.

8). I am very pretty. At late 40-something, I really don’t care if I’m ever in another relationship again. In fact, I don’t seek one, and I’ll let those guess if it’s because my first and only longterm was pure crap --- or, if it’s because I hangout with women who are questionable in their sexual preferences. I know. But, it’s for me, and me only. Life, while some may scoff, to me is normal.

9) I’m in my 60’s, and my wife is an invalid in a nursing home - and has been for sometime. Yes, I have my urges, my wants, my “Damn I’d liketa (with that one)” - but I then sit back.. Hide kinda. I live but I don’t. She lives but she doesn’t. It’s now become normal.

10). I’m in my late 40’s. I control all our company’s finances. The continuance of my company is very dependent upon me. For that, I work almost every night until 7-8pm. Yes, I have a family - and while most are raised - she understands. She’s used to it. It’s normal. It’s the way. It’s my/our life.

Shakin’ your head thinking to yourself “Damn, maybe I ain’t got it so bad.” Uh huh, me too. I coulda spoken about the homeless my son encounters daily. I coulda highlighted the ultra-religious. The drunks. The druggies. The very depressed ones. The up and comers, and the done-made-its. The 3-car garages and the sleep under the Broadway Bridges.

I coulda written as if I were black and what it’s like to interview for a position… or… how it feels to be an illegal immigrant, scared, but trying to do best for my family… or what it’s like trying to sleep at night in Iraq… or worse, what it’s like for the parents of one in Iraq to sleep at night..

Recently (and I like him), in March, Trent Green was bemoaning the fact the Chiefs had treated him/his family horribly while not giving him a fair chance at the Quarterback job, and also not dealing (trading) him in the meantime. “We’ve got to make some decisions regarding our kids and school.“ I computed, Trent’s last game was like December 17th, and from then until he was finally traded - he made $35,000+ per day. He doesn't know any different. To him, he was in normalcy, and conditions changed so now he wasn't.

Is there a summary to all this crap? I don’t really know. If there is - it’s that, whatever your normalcy is - you can’t be too far off base. There are others probably weirder. There are others not quite as happy. There are others who don’t have a realistic look at life. There are others who simply don’t know any better. There are others who makeya think “damn.. I’m glad I am who I am.”

I challenge you. Take a look at ten around you. Chickenscratch in a journal their lives. Then takea look at yours. Normalcy has a broad, broad range. Mosta the time I think the vast majority of us are truly closer to normal than the next Joe. (Terry, not talking about your Joe… remember I said “Editor’s note: This fucking rocks.”)

So on you go. Yes, I know there are days u don’t wear undies. I know there’s no way some days of the week you’d never let anyone in to take a picture of all the rooms of your house. Yes, I know your brain thinks weird shit you’d neva-ever share. Yes, I know you and he/she did “that”. It’s ok. It’s normal to you. That’s all that matters.

Love… as normal, Victurd.