"Hurt Grandma, hurt."

Noon, December 25th, circa roughly 1985:
The meal was served, but all thoughts/attention were on "what's under the tree." We, the "old farts" who'd been thru this so many times before, watched as the little ones devoured their food in a millisecond as it was known "ya have to eat before we open presents."
Could it be THE new Care Bear? The Super Red Rider BB Gun? Big Wheel? The newest Atari game? Hungry Hungry Hippo?....

12:05pm, 12/25/1985..... "Can we open presents now mom?" little nephew Jesse asked, shuffling his peas and mashed potatos in 'reducing' fashion, baited anticipation. Jesse, an adorable blondie, actually kinda resembled Ralphie from Christmas story - what with his horn rim glasses, slicked back hair. (Relax, he now wears contacts)... Jesse, at age 5, didn't want any of the above toys. Nope, his "please please please" was Cowboy Boots.

12:07pm, 12/25/1985.. One of the inlaws was telling an amusing story about a co-worker, absolutely had nothing to do with Christmas.. and virtually at the same time the six rugrats chimed in "Can we PLEASE open presents now?" "Soon, VERY soon, but first we're gonna have some desert, THEN we can."
I don't know why I'm reminded of this, but I was. The desert thing was like the time 1950's-60's kid's radio fella 'Cowboy Bob' signed off.. then forgot to turn off his mike and bellowed "THERE, that oughta please the little bastards."

12:11pm, 12/25/1985... Chocolate pudding, pecan pie, ice cream wolfed down. Nephew Chris, arms now crossed disgustingly, "PLEASE, can we NOW open presents?" "OHHHHHHH0-KKKKK!"
In they ran. 53" of stacked presents sorted to the designated recipient in less than two minutes. "Mark.......... Set........ Gooooooooooooooo." In 94 seconds, over $2000 worth of gifts were opened... wrapping paper now completely covering up the carpet.
"YYYYYYYYYYYYYES, YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYES, YEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!" Jesse triumphantly admonished upon opening the box containing his brand new Cowboy Boots from granny/g-pa. "Yessssssssssssss!" For a second, granny smiled that smile of "yeah... we did pretty darn good... he's a good kid... a deserving kid... we wanted to do right... and it certainly appears we did."

12:13pm, 12/15/1985
After several attempts, Jesse broke down and pleaded "Mom... will you help me get these on?"..... "Sure honey, come on over." They tugged and they pushed, they pushed and they tugged. Ouch... ooooh... uggghh... FINALLY, the right one was on. Same scenario was repeated for lefty.... and it was one of them there Kodak moments to see Jesse proudly peeking down at his brand spankin' new, shiny black Cowboy Boots. YEAHHH!!!!

12:15pm 12/15/1985 "Hurt Grandma, hurt" Jesse proclaimed. The other monsters were already outside (probably with no coats on) playing basketball, throwing the new Frisbee, or in an upstairs bedroom cooing over Chatty Cathy. Jesse meanwhile, was limping noticeably, yet still smiling, yet still proclaiming "hurt Grandma, hurt." Of course, brand new boots hurt. They're stiff, the toes are pointed, and it takes some getting used to.

1:15pm 12/25/1985 "Hurt Grandma, hurt"... "Oh Jesse, I'm sorry.. but they're new, and I'm afraid it is just going to take some getting used to them... you know, kinda breaking them in too." "Ok Grandma." The old folks were now on coffee, exhausted from late night wrapping, early morning Santa arrivals at our respective households. The other snotnoses had enough emotional petrol in them it'd be another 7-8 hours before they were wiped out.

2:30pm 12/25/1985 Jesse's smile was diminishing some, his very definite limp was still there, but he was still very obviously proud.. yet muttered "Hurt Grandma, hurt." "Well Jesse" granny chimed in "maybe it'd be a good idea if you took them off for a bit... went out and played with Chris and Denton."... After a year of anticipation.. Jess peeked down at his boots, then back up at Granny... "Naw, I think I'll be Ok."

3:23pm 12/25/1985... In tears by now, and in a low shriek, occasionally bordering on a very loud shriek "HURT GRANDMA... HURT!".... "Ok Jesse... come on over, granny will take your boots off, *but I'll put 'em RIGHT back on you* but first I'll rub your feet, as I know how much new boots hurt."

3:24pm 12/25/1985 "OHHHH MY GOD...... I can't believe I did that" said granny.

3:30pm 12/25/1985... All is good, Jesse now out "kicking it" with cousins. Running even.

The moral on this one... If at Christmas time, you ever purchase a brand new pair of Cowboy boots for your cool grandson, be sure to take the paper stuffing out of the toes before you wrap them.