Just remember, one minute of one day can make your life better instantly!!!

I love it when a beautiful brain jumps in and says something prophetic, uplifting like that...

to backtrack...

"Dear nieces,

I know I've come across as disgustingly depressed the last few years - and I guess it's simply been who I am.

MAYBE tonight will change all that. I've cried wolf before.

Gotta date to Chief's game with an old high school girlfriend, Debbie.. She's a year younger, simply gorgeous (from my shoes), and has been through a similar experience as I. Debbie's personality is bubbly. Damn the luck, she's a smoker too. Damn the luck, she occasionally enjoys a beer.

It's taken me three months to gain the courage to ask her out... While she grew up of moderate means - she's been married twice - a lawyer each time - and I figured there'd be no way this 8-5 cubicle working, owner of falling apart 93' Ford Taurus with no AC (don't get me wrong, I'll drive that car until it no longer can drive, and I love and appreciate the spirit/history of that car)... anyways, I guess I hadn't asked her out cause I didn't think I stacked up well for her. Ironic, as she was the only girl (in my younger days) that I ever really dumped. What an idiot I was!

Love, Victor

About me: See the funny little clown... he's laughing on the outside.. but crying on the inside... I'm not real sure that perfectly fits - but have you ever been on a roll where one thing after another very bad happens... and you stop.... pray/hope/believe... one day it will get better.

The list: the passing of my one and only beautiful sister in '99. the passing of my super brother-in-law in '00. Each of these passings incredibly changed the families therein. The final yuck days (after many, many good years) of my marriage.. 5/31/01 the morning after the night she'd called at 2am to say, "too drunk to drive home, staying at my sisters." Called her at work the next day. Sick, not there. Called her sister's house.. 'Well, I can't wake her up."... drove there. Car there, no wife. That night "ahm, well, we ran out of beer, I went with this guy to his house to get some more - we started talking and the next thing I know I'm asleep (by myself) on the couch." An interesting tidbit: this couch is now in her living room!..

Dating.. quite a few... and some very damn nice ones.. A couple I even wondered "this MIGHT be the one I could share the resta my life with" only to learn later for whichever reason (hers/mine) it wasn't meant to be.

Loss of job in 2001.. Some lifelong buddies invited me to come into their warehousing business - I would keep books, inventory and in return earn 10% of the business. We grew too quick - and it ended.

Went to Sonic as asst. mgr designated as future manager of the new store to open soon in Lawson, MO. Tedious hours - however fun with the kids.. After opening the Lawson store... a few months later (after I'd worked 114 hours that week) my boss calls me in on Monday morning - my day off and proclaims "we're demoting you to assistant manager ($24K a year) from manager here ($60K).. you know what your problem is Vic? You're just too God damn nice... You need to be an asshole like me."

Happy to say one good did come from that... I love where I work now and it is absolutely not a drudge at all to make the morning commute.

My present home life - and I haven't shared this with many. My son has knocked me to the ground three times in his life. Twice with blows to the jaw, once a full force (didn't know it was coming) push from behind. This has been about two-three years ago.. and it hasn't happened since - but life here is not good. I'm 6', 210, he's 5'7", 140. I can't, cannot, hit my own son. The living room is occupied literally 24/7, so my abode is my bedroom. I live here. It's depressing here. The house.. eh, I won't even tell you.. Let's just say I don't think one of those "we buy ugly houses" types would buy this...

Ok...... back to the thought for the day: Just remember, one minute of one day can make your life better instantly!!! (My niece wrote that too me... she rocks... it rocks... she's her mother's daughter.. and that came thru her - I tuly believe that.

I had that moment last night. As I awaited in the foyer at Debbie's house - when she walked down the steps my jaw literally dropped. Yes, the physical is important - but the course of the night was even better. I observed her love of live, the easiness with which she communicates with people... her wit.. her taking a moment to let someone know they're important to her... it was just very simply all good. She's equally as gorgeous a person as her physical attributes.

Our date lasted from 5pm (Tailgate at Chiefs.. First half in the company suite... left for party at her ('our') friends.. Fabulous. Then talking on her back porch until 5:30am.. Smitten.

I know it's only one date... but it was extremely extremely good. Maybe the roulette ball has finally dropped on my number. Time will tell. Meantime, I'm gonna suckup every moment.