You don't spit into the wind...
You don't pull the mask off that old Lone Ranger
And you don't mess around with Jim.....
I takey break. I tired. I got no ideas in head. I'm boring anyways, so.......
I'll steal.
Weird laws:
Chico, CA... you cannot build, maintain or use a nuclear weapon. I hope Rocketman doesn't know that.
In Connecticut, it is illegal to sell a pickle that does not bounce when dropped from the height of one foot. Makes me think of messy Piggly Wiggly aisles.
In Gainesville, GA., "finger-lickin" is THE WAY. It is illegal to eat fried chicken with anything (aka utensils) other than your fingers.
You can't ride a bicycle with your arms in the air, foot off the pedals, or any other "acrobatic shenanigans on your fancy velocipede" per law in Galesburg, IL.
In the state of Iowa, any person who attempts to pass off margarine, oleo, or oleomargarine as real butter is subject to punishment of up to 30 days in jail and a $625 fine. (What are you in for? Butter not tell.)
To our neighbors in Topeka, Kansas, it is illegal to throw a snowball at any person or property. In 2005, then mayor Bill Bunten tossed a whopper at a snowy tree exclaiming "I'm going to have an ordinance drawn up to repeal this dumb law lest our already-crowded prisons are filled up with children who, while making a snowman, got carried away and had a snowball fight."
Most of the above plagiarized from Reader's Digest, sorry.
In Oregon it illegal to talk dirty while having sex. Makes one wonder how that's monitored.
In Florida, it's illegal to fart in a public place after 6pm on Thursday. (Wonder if it's ok in bed, in Oregon?)
In Oklahoma it is against the law to have a sleeping donkey in your bathtub after 7pm. (That is legal in Oregon when you're having sex but you'd better not say 'jackass'.)
Match.com, PlentyOfFish dating sites not working? Always remember, in Baltimore it is illegal to take a lion with you to the cinema.
Sorry to announce there are no laws prohibiting cannibalism in 49 states, but not the case in Idaho where it is illegal and punishable by up to 14 years in prison. There is, however, an out as it's allowed in "extreme conditions" (like maybe running out of potatoes?)
With apologies to our friends in Arkansas, in Utah you can marry your cousin, but only if you are both over the age of 65.
Traveling abroad? BEWARE:
In the UK, it's illegal to hold a salmon under suspicious circumstances. I didn't make that one up, does sound fishy though.
Hide the Juicy Fruit if you travel to Singapore - illegal.
Also in Singapore, if you move around the house naked, without closing the blinds, you can be arrested. Besides, where would you hide the Juicy Fruit? Ever consider working in Code Enforcement?
In Thailand you cannot leave the house if you are not wearing underwear. (Nevermind on the Code Enforcement thought.)
You cannot hike in the nude in Switzerland. Cross that one off my bucket list.
Passed into law in 2009, it's illegal to be fat in Japan. (Bucket list, strike two.)
In Portugal, you pee in the sea, you're in hot water, so to speak - as it's illegal.
You'd better make sure on "Till Death Do Us Part" in the Philippines and The Vatican as divorce is illegal.
Next time your kid comes home from school in complaint of them being harsh, tell him/her "In Bangladeshi children of 15 age and older can be sent to jail for cheating on their final exams."
In Britain it is illegal to operate a cow while intoxicated. Which cannot be drunk the person or the cow? And, how does one operate a cow?
In Norway, there is a law that protects all female dogs and cats from being spayed. (Legal to neuter male dogs/cats.) Would Donald still welcome them?
Enjoy your Sunday, don't break the law (or break wind in Florida) and for goodness sakes don't mess around with Jim (ah da doo doo da dee dee dee dee)
Love, Victurd
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