When you're hot you're hot.......

And Si, when you ain't, you're not....

Live, from the North Pole.......... no.... wait.. this is Liberty, MO... cell says 3 below (I know it's worse elsewhere, it's ok, I'm old, I like to gripe.) Wind chill is -11 degrees, as parents scramble to find sitters for their kiddos - there ain't no standin' out in this to await the yellow bus that may/may not start.......

I remember hot. No, not me, remember? Sister always said "You look like Alfred E. Newman.".. We'd go to a relative's house we hadn't seen in awhile.. and it was always "Isn't Vanda beautiful.. and isn't Victor... ahm, growing."

Depression. Well yes, comments like the above could lend that, but no, I'm perfectly fine with it! Depression, as in cold weather? Well sure, it's cold as... well.. I was gonna say that, but that's supposed to be hot.

Hot as in The Depression Era in KC.. August 14, 1936 the temp reached 113 degrees - still the record today. We've been thru heatwaves in 1934, 1936, 1954 and in 1980. CHA CHING, that one rings a bell.

In 1980 roughly 40% of KC residents still didn't have AC. During the heatwaves of '34, '36, and '54 residents would camp out at Swope Park, The Liberty Memorial and Penn Valley Park to find cooler areas. Didn't happen in 1980, a thing called crime had come along. Sadly, 176 heat-related deaths happened.

What are your memories of being hot? Of course, as kids, biking, hiking, swimming... laying on a pallet with a fan trained on you - or - if you were lucky enough to have a window unit, plopped down in front of that. Remember riding in the car with the windows down, wing pointed IN to get air circulation? Tell that one to a millennial and watch 'em give the old Scooby-Doo "huh?" as they scratch their heads...

WORST JOB EVER... Yours? I've had jobs where I sweated and loved it. I'm weird in that I enjoy the heat. I know a couple of transplanted Michiganians (or Michinganites, however in the heck you say it) and they (love this) HATE the hot. I cursed them, kinda, as my bones creaked hopping in my car this morning. OK, it wasn't really a hop.. it was "gingerly got into the car." Victor, ginger as in Alfred E? Nope, ginger as in old. Anyways, I HOPE THEY ARE HAPPY.

OK, worst job ever.. for me anyways.. hauling sod. I lasted ONE DAY. It was damn hot. HOW HOT WAS IT? (More on that one later.) It was hot, let's just say that. Sod is heavy, I've got wimpy arms - but, the very worst part was the bugs. Yuck, yuck and more yuck. So how does one prepare for the bugs? Well, you wear long sleeves. Now I do enjoy heat, but that was pushing it. If there's any one out that that ever hauled sod and enjoyed it, please don't say so 'cause I'll think you're nutso.

HEEEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY................

Carson thrived on moments like "It was very hot today." HOW HOT WAS IT?

It was so hot:
"Cows are giving evaporated milk."
"Chickens are laying boiled eggs."
"I saw two fire hydrants fighting over a dog."
"Bill Clinton has sworn off sex until we get a cool snap."
"Rosie O'Donnell is selling shade."
"I saw a robin dipping his worn in Nestea."
"It was so hot today that Burger King was saying 'If you want it made
your way, cook it yourself."

Cold cold go away - we're shriveled up here (And I know your first thought.. damn there's a lotta perves here.)

If it's any consolation, it's gonna be 93 in Rio today.

And, if it's of any assistance:

Only 54 hours until we reach 32 degrees.
28 days until pitchers/catchers report.
44 days to Spring.
135 days until June, July and August. (Us, and the oak mites canardly wait.)
And... based on two Home Playoff wins in KC Chief's 54 year history (that's one every 27 years) so, our next one should be in 26 years in 2,044. (When you're hot your hot, when you're not you're not.)

"In a relationship with Air Conditioner." Someone said.

Back to head scratchin'... the BlogSpot thing keeps track of whatintheheck the audience is for this specific blog (What countries have visited here). Fancy for "I tried Googling "Check Engine Light to fix my car and this blog popped up." Folks from ten different countries have stumbled on here. The warmest one, at present, might find someone typing:

"J'ai googlé le voyant ainsi je pourrais réparer mon Peugeot et j'ai obtenu ce blog. Il fait 51 degrés ici, que voulez-vous dire froid" which of course is fancy for the Frenchman's "I Googled check engine light so I could fix my Peugeot and got this blog. It's 51 degrees here, what do you mean cold?"

"Wherever you go, no matter what the weather is, always bring your own sunshine." Anthony J. D'Angelo

Pandora if you like:

Summer Breeze
Surfin' Safari
Summertime
Summer in the City
School's Out
Saturday in the Park (I think it was the 4th of July)
Those Lazy Hazy Cray Days of Summer

When you're hot you're hot, when you're not you're not......

Oh, and if you ever run into a transplanted Michiganite and it happens to be one degree.. show 'em the temperature with your hand. (Two degrees, use both hands.)

Come on baby light my fire...... Love, BrrrrrrrTurd