Rabbit in a snowstorm.......or, Hello Dolly...

Block, as in writer's block. (Victurd, who called you a writer?) Ok talkback, you win. Howabout Bloggers block? (Sustained.) Geez, thanks your Honor.

Driving in - tossing and turning - head spinnin'/thinkin' about a multitudea crap. The change in seasons... Nah, done that before - it'd be mundane - no matta how our utility bills like this timea year.

MU/KU rivalry? Every time I write about sports - it seems to be a tonic for anyone swinging by to take a nap... Sex? Nah, how can I be an expert when I ain't practicin'?

Animals? Nah, we all (mostly) love 'em, and we're filled to the gills of emails with cutesy animal pics.. Money? We could talk money?.. Nah, no thanks... you know that thingamabob you cook spaghetti in - the thing that kinda looks like a pan - but it's got holes in the bottom to drain out the water? That's what I think of when I thinka money. Fill that bastard up... more, more, MORE.. and it's never enough.. fugger will never fill up.. See? Toldya.. It ain't half full.. the sonofabitch leaks!

Bubbly is always a good topic (co-worker who we will leave anonymous)... Yes.. Yes she is. You'd have to know her.. I love Ms. Bubbly.. She's a bright, young, Bubbly, intelligent, speakswhateverinthehell is on her mind, attractive young chicky I work with. June Cleavage she can be. Push the envelope? Nah, she just wants to be herself - and for some jealous reason, some here at our 1960's-like family owned business want to control how she thinks, how she acts, and even whereinthehell she parks. Oh sure, she drops more than her fair share of F-bombs - but we're used to it now and there ain't no shock value any more...

Her wit is quick, and what's even better - she laughs at virtually all my attempts at humor.. She says the typical office stuff like "I just farted." "I wish I'd get my period." "Have you seen that sale's rep for 'ABC Company'? I'd suck on him all night long." You know, the usual stuff people say in the office - hehe. The other day, nuther friendly/funny lady was winging banter back and forth with Bubbly - (other lady happened to have on a red and white horizontally striped top) - and without the bat of an eye Bubbly responded back "fuck you Where's Waldo...yada yada yada." She's quick - she's a snowflake. We love her... Cept for a couplea people...

Yes... she hada fender bender recently in the work parking lot.. She was leaving at 5p, a semi-uppity lady wasa backin' out - KABOOM. Fairly severe damage to Bubbly's car.. Oh my, the lady she hit - last winter - my buddy Leon (the 73 yr old smartass, nice, nice man who'd never hurta fly) went around to all the cars in the parking lot with a plastic snow shovel and got all the snow off... Ms. semi-uppity came to him the next morning with a gravely piece of mind and something along the line of "you keep you GD hands/snow shovel off my car - I got a scratch." <-- So, this is how much this lady loves her car. Ouch.

"Bubbly was exiting the entrance." (We ain't gotta entrance or exit - there's two ways in/out - and both are used for each). "I was all the way backed up - she rear ended me." Not exactly how it happened - in fact, Ms. semi-uppity's car was backing out in the direction to exit the so-called entrance.

Ms. Bubbly's car wouldn't turn after the fender bender. Her headlight was smashed out ("Oh no.. Barney Fife is gonna suredly pull me over for that when I'm on my way home from 'church' some night." <-- so.. until the insurance company settles - she asked her mechanic if it was possible to duct tape the headlight on.. hehe..)

So.. Bubbly put her car in the shop. A couple days later, the PM lady (People Management I think they call it) called her in.. says.. "I've had reports you've been speeding thru the parking lot." Ms. Bubbly (please, please Ms. Bubbly - don't hold it in!) "I ain't even had a fuckin' car the last two days... howinthehell have I been speeding thru the parking lot?" (The day my mama socked it to - the Harper Valley PTA...)

We've got probable millions and millions of precious dollars being raised here in the work we do - and this PM lady would rather mess with trivial, judgmental crap like this? Geez.

"Don't you realize our parking lot is a privilege?... You need to keep your car parked between the lines.... You car is too big.. people can't see around it... You can't park in that corner spot any more.." Ms. Bubbly gave up (for now).. "Whatever."

I am very very thankful that for most of my life - I've tried and tried to see how other's think/behave from their shoes - and.. have tried to live with the belief we simply all think differently. It ain't my way or the highway. It's what makes us sucha wonderful, wonderful world. I love Bubbly's way of thinking - seeing from her shoes. It's really too bad there are those in the world that have just one pair of shoes to see from.

And Mr. Baker can you tell us why your secretary had to leave this town.. And shouldn't widow Jones be told to keep her window shades all pulled completely down... Now Mr. Harper couldn't be here 'cause he's stayed too long in Kelly's bar again.. And if you smell Shirley Thompson's breath you'll find she's had a little nip of gin....And then you have the nerve to tell me as a mother you think that I ain't fit...Well this is just a little Payton Place and you're all Harper Valley hypocrits....

Harpy day... Victurd