He could tie WHAT into a knot?

The human body is a most incredible thing. Recently I read about some kid that was named the Star(Kansas City bigass newspaper) Scholar-Athlete of the year. The kid maintained a 4.0 whilst winning the State Championship in wrestling three years running. His coach exclaimed "he didn't have exemplary workout habits... he had UNBELIEVABLE habits."

Once interviewed, the kid said "I realized at age 13, you can push your body beyond limits people set. It's a remarkable thing."

At age 52, having had one ortho knee surgery... I'd been destined to walk whenever I went to workout. That Sunday morning's paper gave me new life - a great impetus - and I JUST KNEW I could run around that track like in days gone by.

Nope. Reality has set in... Yes, perhaps I can run the straight-aways and walk the curves.. but an all out 3 mile jog is currently outta the question. My apologies to Mr. Scholar-Athlete.

Chuck Lifquin was an athletic specimen in his own right. Swedish looks, 6'4", 220 lbs, built like the proverbial "V".

Chuck came to our Liberal Art's College roughly the summer of 1973... and word of his "prowess" spread quickly. Chuck played varsity football as a Freshman... wrestled Varsity..... but NEITHER was his "prowess".

Ok, listen up. Jeannie, Valerie, Vickie (2nd cousin, niece, niece) please don't read any futher.

Yes, Chuck could tie his penis in a knot. I swear. He wasn't braggadocious of it.. more matter-a-factly. Like I said (Have I heard that before?) Chuck was fairly popular with the women on campus.

Proof.. There had to be proof. Chuck pledged our fraternity. If you recall, our fraternity was like John Belushi times two. Hell week.

"We understand there is a pledge amongst your class that has a 'special' stupid human trick.".....

"Ahm yes, I guess there is."

"Chuck - FRONT AND CENTER." This isn't really gonna happen is it? Yes, I think it is. We pledges were forced to stay awake 24/7 for the entire week... and occasionally, if there was something that happened the "actives" deemed worthy, they'd allow us to snag a two-hour nap. We deemed Chuck's exploits worthy of the attempt.

So......... Chuck... with 20 fellow pledges pleading behind him...... and 35 "actives" Ya-Hoo'ing" infronta him... dropped his drawers.

One expected like a foot long hot dog - but it wasn't that at all... It was simply a very long, elastic penis. It took Chuck three to four tries, but finally, there it was....... the knot. Yes, I did see it, yes, I do believe it... YES, you creeps, I am perhaps envious.

We pledges were so very proud of Chuck and his special 'talents'... for we gained an additional two hours sleep that night. Knot sleepy any more.