(Trust me, I know this is stupid, really goofy.. some days you just simply need a break from the real news of the world - light works. Butterflies (and butt blogs) are free. If you no likey, all good, butt thanks for your patience with me.)
There’s butt joint, buttstock, head butt, buttocks, cigarette butt, Boston butt, port butt, archery butt…
Square butts, V-Shape butts, A-Shape butts, Round butts, Upside-down heart butts…
Bubble butts, no butts, skinny butts, bony butts, pancake butts…
There’s a belfie.. Booty.. Bum, buttaholic, butt cheeks, butt cleavage, butt dimples, derriere, donk, glutes, mooning, plumber’s crack, twerking, wedgie…
Lotta butt stuff.
Many, MANY men are enthralled by women’s butts.
Now just a gol’ durn minute, many, MANY women are enthralled by men’s butts.
Butt dialing.
Why do doctors slap babies butts right after they are born? To knock the penises off the smart ones. (har har)…
Why did Little Ms Muffett push Humpty Dumpty off the wall? Because she wanted to see his crack.
Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.
Do clown farts smell funny?
A little old man who’s hard of hearing goes to see the doctor. As he can’t hear well, he takes his wife with him. The doctor examines the man and then says “Hmmm, I think we need to take a stool sample, a urine sample and a sperm sample.” The old man turns to his wife and says “What did he say?”.. Wife replies “He said he wants your underwear.”
Butt of a joke… butt-hurt…
My dad used to sing “She’s got freckles on her but(t?) she’s pretty”…
Quick research Google says “The 9 best butt exercises”, “The best 24 moves to target your glutes”, “Trainers reveal: The best butt exercises of all time”, “14 of the best butt exercises you can do without a gym membership”, “9 best butt exercises for a strong, shapely booty”…
Backside, rear-end, posterior, heinie, keister, rump, tail-end, apple bottom, arse, tush, seat, fanny, dumper (sorry), cheeks, bum, duff, gluteus maximus, patootie, britches……
All hail Ryan McLatchy.. Who? Ryan McLatchy, the inventor of yoga pants. Sorry. Not really.
“I’ve been faithfully going to the gym for months.” Wow! Kudos. A “new you?”, “Fortitude found?”…………. Nope, spandex.
This has been PG rated. (Positive Glutes).. Trust me, friggin’ Google has a very dirty mind for it could have been a lot, lot, worse. I wonder if Siri, Alexa, Echo Dot, yada, are equally perverted?
So tell me.. Did you simply wake up and think “Today I’m going to do a blog about butts?”….
Yes, butt I tried thinking of other things to write about - honest I did.
Why do ducks have feathers? To cover their butt-quack.
Best selling book: “Sliding Down the Banister” by Major Arssore.
Under the Bleachers by Seymour Butts.
Borrowing from my buddy Forest, “That’s about it.”
And away go troubles down the drain.
The end, pun, mebbe intended.
Love, Victurd
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