It's the hap happiest time, of the year - BUT.. holy guacamole do we make adjustments.
That there word: adjustment. How feeeeeeenominal of a word is it? It's everything. Lord knows if we didn't have one Andy Reid at the helm to make adjustments - dunno where we'd be. Well, maybe like the Detroit Lions.
Christmas is all about adjustment. I remember I'd purchased one of the grandkids an article of clothing from WallyWorld - don't even remember which grand or what the article was - but, an adjustment was needed. Didn't fit. We (my daughter inlaw and I) were going to WallyWorld for something December 26 of one year... as we left the car to go in she grabbed a sack and said "I'm gonna take this in and exchange it for the right size." Being old and grumpy, but to not surprise her by the line at customer service I offered "Are you sure?" And of course in line at Customer Service was seemingly 3/4ths of Clay County. "Oh. I think I'll wait until next time we come." An adjustment for the adjustment. Good call.
Divorce, birth, death.. .wow.. adjustments annually it seems. New job mebbe, old job/new boss mebbe.. retirement mebbe - adjustment. You, me and the gym. Kinda like those magnets where you take whichever pole it is so it's impossible to get 'em together.. and... you, me and the gym are like that. So, we adjust, our belt size. Our pant size. Our rationalization size. In our chest of drawers, the bottom one is for the pant size we outgrew 6 years ago, the next drawer up is for the pants we outgrew this past year (ok damnit, three years ago) but we ain't gonna throw 'em away because we're gonna make adjustments in our eating, exercising.... uh huh, and the Detroit Lions are gonna win the Super Bowl next year.
Divorce. Mid-slumber, ya reach across the bed, feel for your mate.. your hand pats the mattress three times, then you remember "oh yeah, she (or he) left, forgot." Adjustment. WHAT? I have to cook? I've GOT this! Now... which one is the stove? So, you rescue a dog or a cat, play that 'hard candy Christmas' song by Dolly... and life, thanks to adjustment, I'll be fine and dandy.
Death - adjustment is much more difficult. When we're reminded, we somehow always swallow, and it's hard to swallow. The eyes moisten up a bit, the head tilts toward the ground - then we realize we must, we must we must - lift ourselves back up. Much much worse than having to adjust having pants two sizes bigger - death is the most difficult adjustment there is - as it will NEVER be the same. On we go. Kinda sorta. If we must. We gotta. They'd want us to. Adjust. I/we will try.
A little one. Baby's first Christmas - what better? Amidst all the clatter and chatter, in the middle of a score of relatives, they snooze soundly in the bassinet. And, adjustment between baby's first Christmas and second Christmas, wow. Harold? Look around for ANY small item that baby might try to put in his/her mouth. I've noticed, if they can't eat it, they'll sit on it. I know the Christmas tree looks weird with no lights on the bottom third of the tree, but, it's GOT to be, thataway (adjustment.)
As baby ages, adjustments are made.. early, they sit on Santa's lap and snooze, all good. The next year it's "OH MY GOD, IT'S A FAT MONSTER, I'VE NEVER SEEN SO MUCH HAIR, I'M CRYING, PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME SIT ON HIS LAP." To, "I can't wait to tell Santa exactly what I want, and that I've been a good (boy/girl).. to, one leery eye on the fat man, "Johnny told us at recess there ain't no Santa Claus..and I believe him, this dude's beard just doesn't look real."
I heard a friend say one time, "I've been dirt poor, and I've had occasion where I bought anything I ever wanted." In this day and age where a sheet of plywood goes for more than I paid for my very first car, and.. where ground beef is now considered a luxury, I think being on the poor end of things, in spite of how yucky it might feel to be that way, makes one sooooo proud to be able to adjust, forfeit personal things, ways of living - just to buy for little ones, family. I know a family, BARELY getting by, they'd start in June and buy one gift for one of their kids on payday. And again the next paycheck. Etc. Proud. Proud they were to have made those adjustments to provide for their kiddos.
Where it usedta be, we'd gather at granny's on the 24th, this sibling got this bedroom, this sibling got that bedroom, the cousins were very very content with 'pallets' on the living room floor, next to the Christmas tree. "Maybe we can catch Santa thisaway!" Awaken, YEAH! It's Christmas! Toooooooooooooooooooooo now:
Well, let's see the weekend before Christmas, we'll go to your folks house.. then Wednesday and Thursday, we can take Johhny to my ex'es for their Christmas.. On the actual Christmas, we'll take your Susie to your ex'es because it's 'her year' to have the for Christmas. Christmas for us at Granny's, then, Christmas at the other granny on... and your granny's on... where the hell was I? Oh yeah, I was adjusting. I feel the need for a nap, but not on a pallet. Gimme gimme gimme my sleep number bed. You can come too and adjust your own damn side.
Christmas. Adjustments mean different cities. Different years sometimes. "We can't come this year, but I guarantee we will be there in 2022." Different modes of travel. Over the river and through the woods, to grandmother's house we'll go, the horse knows the way to carry the sleigh (VICTOR! You're pushing it!) Let's stick to planes trains and automobiles ok? Sure. I remember, sister and I in the backa the station wagon. She'd 'call' the seat right behind our folks, so I was left to sit in the very backa the station wagon. I was getting to the age of, "Ok, cool."
Now. NOW. You strap little Jonathan in SOOOO tighly in his carseat, it'd take an act of Congress to get him out. We all know nowadays, how easy it is the get an act of Congress eh?
A newby to the family. No, not talking snotnose (sorry, kinda).. talking a boyfriend or a girlfriend or a new hubby or wifey. Oh we're polite as all get out (and they too in kind) but we watch every damn move to make sure they ain't an axe murderer, gold digger, alchy, all that.
I've rambled, apologies. I'll get outta here but first, one more adjustment. Aging. Blessed are those of us given the opportunity to age. As we watch, listen, love at Christmas time - it takes us back to 'our day' as a little guy (or gal).. at a teen.. young adult. Young parent.. One of my fondest, most recent memories was watching my son, screwdriver in right hand, instructions in left hand, 200+ parts of a toy he must assemble in front of him. Ahhhhh (with smile), good luck son, brb, I'm going for a Miller Lite now!
Practiced parent - and now, GRAND. As a grandparent. As we look across the room, we too envision yesteryear and we can virtually see all those no longer here. Remembering is such a wonderful part of adjustment.
As we've aged, gone through those adjustments - we also remember it goes back decades to our folks and our grandparents reliving those memories of younger days.
In spite of all the adjustments, sleighs, planes, trains, automobiles, this sidea the family this day, that side that day, tots, ornamentless bottoms of trees, pallets, carseats, those new ones, those gone.. it's a wonderful, wonderful tradition.
Hours and hours of wrapping presents, shredded to bits in milliseconds. The smiles afforded by allowing the eyes to follow the tots, watch them open gifts with wondrous anticipation.. the meeting of eyeballs to those you've met their eyeballs year after year after year. Remembering the eyeballs, smiles of those no longer around.
Christmas is a darn good adjustment.
Certainly NOT asking for pity. I'm happy as a lark, however happy that is, must be good, it's been quoted a kajillion times. Divorced twice, parent of a divorced child, he one state, the grands just across the line in another. Only remaining member of my nuclear family. I've had a wondrous life. I've had way too many damn jobs, but loved them, adjusted to them all. Wondering though, maybe I shoulda been a chiropractor, they're the best at adjustments.
By Henry Gibson.. forward by Pancho Gonzales (Feliz Navidad)
I want to wish you a Merry Christmas from the bottom of my heart!
Love, Victurd
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