Reallytired......

Tired: in need of sleep or rest; weary.... bored with.. no longer fresh or in good condition..

re: Once more..(reactivate).. with return to a previous state (revert)..

So, no comprende why retire is called retire. We work when we're tired. When we 'retire' it ain't "once more".. It (retire) ain't 'with return to a previous state'.. It should be reallytired.

Roy Williams, the famous basketball coach, tells his players (in reply to hearing "tired") "you're too young to be tired." I like that, I really like that. In fact, I repeat it to snotnoses (said lovingly) at work who mutter how tired they are. I'm AARP elgible. I'm SS eligible. I'm reallytired and wanna be reallytired.

It's hard, I think, to relate to people under forty, maybe even fitty, what it feels like to REALLY wanna be 'reallytired' (retired).. From day one, when we learned to march (silently) from our 1st grade chair to the lunchroom - we've been obligated to "do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign."

LinkedIn, no thanks. Resume', huh uh, ne'er again. 'Polite' (reminder) emails from HR hinting of admonishment if one doesn't "do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign" - paaaaaaaatoooooooey! Remind me, I'm tired, reallytired. I'm reallytired of being 'led'. (I looked up 'led, in a work situation' on "Vikapedia" and yep, there was a picture of a horse with blinders on it.) Ha! I wanna moonwalk (singing "ABC") from my desk to the cafeteria seat. I wanna attend only the last ten minutes of the two hour Long Range Planning Meeting. I'm reallytired. I wanna be reallytired!

I would miss the birthday celebrations. Uncle Don had a children's radio show from 1928 until 1947. One day, upon completion of his program, he forgot the turn the mike off and out slipped "THERE, that ought to hold the little bastards!".. EXACTLY, I'll buy a Mylar balloon once a month in memory of the birthdays,,, that ought hold the little bastards! (I josh, I love my coworkers, I'm just reallytired.)

I would miss the countdown (number of days until retirement) thingy on my cubicle wall I update when I get a 'polite' email, 'suggestion' from boss, list of new building rules (do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign"),etc... I guess, insteada the countdown, I could send automated emails to myself every six days reminding me to "Magic Eraser" the stool, tub, sink (not necessarily in that order.) I could have my printer automatically (sometime near the end of November each year) print an entire ream of "Roberts Rules of Order" to use as kindling to stoke my fireplace for the winter.

I'm on vacation. I could get used to this. I could enjoy one day being permanently on revacation, or reallyvacation. No alarm, no 'friendly' HR reminders, no "do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign".... why, I could even wear my undies and scratch myself on the way to the 'cafeteria' every day if I wanted!.. I could forward R and X rated emails to my buddies bypassing the intrusive IT department that presently adorns them to read "explicit language" on the receiving end. "No profanity, that shit ain't allowed here, do as I say, not as I do." Sorry, a reallytired moment. (I'll update my Cubicle calendar to 1,380 days to go when I get back.)

I gotta go.... again.. (It's an old man thing)... I hope you are reallytired. If you're just tired, then please do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign. No cussing. Do not pass go, do not collect $200 (Christmas bonus.. oops, slipped, sorry), and please put the lid down. (<-- Yes, we did get a company email on that.)

Bye now. Scratching myself enroute to the bathroom where I'll leave the lid up. Then, I'm gonna take a nap. I am really tired, figuratively to one day be literally reallytired. Sorry. kinda. The rebel in me snuck out.

Love, Victurd. ("WHAT BLOG BOSS? I don't have a blog!")