Note to self.........

Examine the lock of your bathroom door (in advance).

Daily routine. 5:20am alarm. Say "ha ha", hit snooze. Say "ha ha" one more time (twice if I'm really sleepy), then lumber out of bed.

Listen to Joel Nichols so I'll know how to dress for the weather.. check email, FB, wing 'likes' at creativity, beautiful children... cig/coffee.

6:00am. Go to bathroom. This timea year, take space heater in, plug it in, get it stoked. Start bath water. Exit, close door so heat will stay in.

More Joel/Donna/Chris, another cig, wander the internet.

6:04am, grab new pair of undies (or flip dependent upon the day), go take bath.

Oh shit.

Door locked. Panic. I don't even know the main # to the apartment complex I live in, let alone the emergency #. (2nd note to self).

More panic. "I wonder how close the water is to overflowing?". Google "Cherokee Apartments", write down phone number, run to living room where my smart phone that's been acting stupid is plugged in. Nada. No 'charge light', no nuttin'. Shit.

Grab nail. Stick it in that little hole in the lock. Nope. Grab screwdriver, frantically pushing, pulling, flipping up, flipping down. Nope.

Ask one's self "If it does overflow, runs over, and invades the privacy of my space heater, could I get electrocuted on this sidea the door as the water trickles through?

Wake up neighbor, have 'em call 911? (3rd note to self: Always wear something en route to the restroom).

Last gasp: pry screwdriver between the edge of the door and the lock.

YES! (4th note to self: It's perfectly ok to laugh at yourself).

Love, Victurd.