2087

Ohwell Orwell...

Next April will mark the 50 year anniversary of the manned space drome which made automobiles obsolete, infrastructures less costly, and allowed Uncle Sam to devote boo koo dollars to The Space Force. (Hail to "You're in the Space Force now, you're nowhere near a cow, you'll never get rich, by digging a ditch, you're in the Space Force now.") As we've learned, if you are blonde, or very elderly, or in a foreign country, DromeMobiles have given a whole new meaning to Lost in Space.

The Kansas City Chiefs broke a 117 year dry spell by winning Super Bowl CXX over the Salt Lake Rams 44-37. The Chiefs rolled over the Toronto Chargers and the London Raiders en route to the big game.

In the World Series, the Mexico City Bricklayers lost in 7 games to the Bentonville Royals, marking the first ever Series where a team didn't hit a home run.. the wall proving insurmountable for the Layers.

From New York, Barron Trump has been moved from the Trump Towers to an assisted care facility in Schenectady.. This coincides with plans to demolish the old building in 2088, and plans are in motion - per Trump attorney Spinner Giuliani - adding the family's interests will be used to build a Stripper's Strip Mall on the old site with completion expected by 2089.

Chips implanted into the middle knuckle are set to be the 'new thing' as the 2087 Consumer Electronic Show is set to embark in December. This chip will enable folks to simply scan their knuckle at retail outlets, making the credit/debit card a thing of the past. It's even predicted it will be possible to fist bump and pay McBurgerKing clerks, or even allow one to tip exotic dancers via this fist bump method. Naysayers worry that intentional fist fights will occur whereby hackers will attempt to steal, decode chip information.

Also at the show, Geico announced they have teamed with Sony and will introduce in 2088 the World's Largest Phone Screen - a 24" screen foldable device that breaks down to fit in your pocket. Consumers will be able to purchase with same day drone service from AmaEBay..or, walk in and buy at BestBuyShack.. Generic models may be purchased at HomeLowes or SamCost.

Farmland has announced plans to move their headquarters to Beijing, China - thanks in large part to China's inventing, discovering, mass producing lab-grown beef and pork. Fu Yu Tar'iefs has been announced as the new Farmland CEO.

Uberdrone is taking Tesladrone to court over the all important rights to air-taxi service. It is believed Uberdrone will be victor in this battle, sources citing "Tesladrone doesn't have a leg to stand on."

Ron Thurmond, great great great Grandson of the late Strom Thurmond, on Tuesday introduced a bill in Congress to repeal the 60 year old "One (term) and Done" legislation. "It's either that, or raise our damned minimum wage pay," the red-faced Senator from South Carolina fumed.

In sports, it's a sad day as Edgar McDowell, the oldest living umpire, has passed away. It's been 49 years since the MLB replaced umpires with mechanical robots.. an article from the day that was announced noted Earl Weaver, Ozzie Guillen, Lou Piniella, Billy Martin and Tony Larussa - all - were rolling over in their graves.

Shares of LibBook and ConservativeBook, spinoffs of the now defunct Facebook, hit all time highs on the Dow, as it topped out at 52,240 - thanks in large part to the disappearance of vitriol on either site.

A Gen Z'er has been spotted with a sign at a recent rally to protest the demise of Social Security and Medicare, reading "I blame the damn Millennials, those bastards never worked, contributed anyways."

And at another rally, this one in Washington DC, media icons representing CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Bloomberg, ESPN News, yada, all protesting recent Senate Legislation forcing these companies to subscribe to Snopes.com's sister company Snoops.com.. For years, each network berated, belittled fellow networks as being "Fake News" - lawmakers penned the legislation in hopes of ensuring truthful news on behalf of all Americans.

And that's the truth, per, checkdronelight.blogspot.

By Henry Gibson the VII'th,

Love, Victurd