Not a good idea to crack pecans with your teeth..
A 1997 Buick La Sabre with a broken gas gauge will go exactly 354.7 miles on a full tank of gas...
Companies that ain't making money get ridda employees...
Sometimes, when umpiring, a foul tip will bounce right in front of the catcher, bound up thru his legs, barely miss his behind, and land squarely...... well.. you know.
"Till death do us part" means different things to different people.
It's important to remember to lock the door at work when using the unisex bathroom.
When at red traffic light, turning right... even though traffic looks clear from left so you rev it up and go, it very important car stopped in fronta you think so too.
Cars make very funny noises when you're driving down road, think you're putting it in neutral, but accidentally hit "R".
A Volkswagen will definitely float, but it won't float indefinitely.
A Redbox movie turned in 5 days late can sometimes cost you $200 in overdraft fees.
You single, divorced, simply want human interaction on Christmas, Dennys is only choice.
When rearranging furniture in bedroom during day, always make sure bedroom light bulb operative for midnight pee.
Sports teams you cherish will give you every possible emotion there is.
Sometimes, you fill trusted one up with secret, he/she leaks.
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Learned the wonderful way:
Vast majority of folks, very good.
Many, unbelievable in their loyalty, concern, compassion.
"You can count on me" upheld by many throughout a lifetime.
Blood perhaps is thicker than water, but many of us fortunate to have had some very wonderful in laws.
Aha, I remembered. There IS a new 4-pack of TP under the sink.
Work can be fun.
A job well done takes a team.
There's no feeling like having, holding your infant child.
There's no feeling like having, holding your grandchild.
Receiving one's smile goes a long way to making one's day.
Touch (of course, done properly) is a very good thing.
There's a special feel when, after some absence, seeing a family member again.
Seeing others happy is contagious.
Humor very definitely helps keep the blood flowing.
Blood flowing, at an old age, a very good thing.
Knowing when to say "when" when sitting at this damn keyboard.
Love (I've heard is a many splendored thing), Victurd
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