Size matters....

If you're going up for a rebound.

With regard to your 401K at the time of your retirement.  (Do as I say, not as I do..dear snotnoses, put 10% away every paycheck and 'no touchy.')

When the NFL ref tucks his head under the tarp covering the 6" TV screen for "Further review" whilst we at home watch on our 60" bigscreens.

"What counts is not necessarily he size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."  Dwight D. Eisenhower

I bet a kajillion dollars there are enough "That drawer is full of clothes for me 2 sizes ago that I will never-eva fit in again, but I'm keepin'" - to adequately clothe every homeless person in the World.

Matters when you're flying... in the middle seat.

Opines differ on where ya wanna live.  Some, like the hustle-bustle of the city, choosing to live in a condo on the 39th floor, where they have on the ground a 2 foot by 20 foot grass strip for their dog to poop on.  Some prefer, "Oh give me a home, where the buffalo roam, and they can poop any dangwhere they please. "  I likes small towns with a square surrounding a Courthouse - where it doesn't take much gas money to get to where 'country' is, fast.

"Life is too short, and I'm Italian.  I'd rather eat pasta and drink wine than be a size '0"." Sophia Bush

Awhile back at a Wellness event at work, one thing they measured was the size of your waist.  "Pun perhaps intended ma'am, but you're 'wasting' your time measuring mine, I've been a size 36" waist since Ronald was in office."....  Yessir, I understand, but we actually measure around the belly button.  Oops.  Size matters where you measure.

Golfers want drivers the size of their baby's head...  Country boys want tires on their pickups sooo big they gotta use a pogo stick just to get in.  I think I hold the world record for number of Piggly Wiggly sacks in my two hands simply because I'm too lazy to make two trips.

Size comes into play in power.. ego.. hurdles.. the nose guard across fromya.  (Chris Jones, KC Chief nose guard, begins every game looking across at his opponent, and offers "Whatsup fatty?")  Size matters if you're going thru the metal detector at the Jackson County jail in Kansas City and ya gotta wear an underwire bra.  "Ahm, ma'am, you'll have to take that off and place it in this bin."

Bear bed size mattered to Goldilocks. Goliath's size didn't matter to David.  Size of inheritance share, sadly, is allowed to be the cause of family disarray, departure.   The 1976 introduction of the Big Gulp changed the soft drink arena forever.

"First impressions matter. Experts say we size people up somewhere between 30 seconds and two minutes."  Elliott Abrams

Tallest man, 8'11".. Woman, 7'7".    Heaviest, 1,400 lbs.  Thanks to Richard Simmons help, Rosalie Bradford went from 1,199 lbs to 200 lbs. a weight loss record for women at 999 lbs.  Heaviest baby ever born, 22 lbs, ouch.

For his wife's birthday, a hubby bought her a dress two sizes too small to encourage her to lose weight, adding, "I look forward to seeing you in it."  For his birthday, she bought him a coffin.

Many years ago, I shingled (by my lonesome, it was a money thing!) the roof of our three story house by tying myself to a rope attached to the chimney on the other end.  Now, I don't think there is any 'test' rope that would hold me.

And "Oh, OK, for you perverts that've been waiting":

The 6th grade science teacher asked her class "Which human body part increases to ten times it's size when stimulated?"  No one answered  Finally, little Mary stood up and said "You should not be asking 6th graders questions like that!  I'm going to tell my parents, then the principal, who will then fire you!"

The teacher ignored Mary, and asked the question again - and again it was met with silenece.  She followed with "Anybody?"  Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously and said "The body part that increases to ten times it's size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye."

"Very good Billy" the teacher replied, then glared at Mary and said "As for you young lady, I have three things to say:  One, you have a dirty mind.  Two, you didn't read your homework, and Three, one day you're going to be very disappointed."

Size matters.  Damnit darnit.

Love, Victurd