Yelp, I need somebody....... Yelp, not just anybody....

Frienda mine.... large, nifty yard - has a yap-dog. I say yap-dog, and I don't mean that disparagingly. He's little, he's young, he yaps. Fulla energy, life. With poles, trees, bricks,
rocks, you-name-the-obstacle, life for him on a chain doesn't work well. Thus.........

The purchase of a wireless "shock" system... Imagine digging a circle around the entirety of your house, laying wire - and having a shock collar for your dog should he approach the wire. Well, this system is wireless... you place the big control thingy indoors, and it sends out signals that will zap the little feller - and it can be set for 45' in each direction, up to 90' in each direction - and....... u can kinda control the SHOCK of the shock, ie, settings from 1 to 10, dependent upon the size of the dog, or, your sadistic mood I would gather.

This system takes much training before turning yap completely loose... kinda like, I suppose, life/growing up. The 'shock collar' includes two prongs, damn near half the size of a fork tong (ya know, for longhaired dogs).. as pooch approaches the electric zap (or, as the manufacturer politically correctly entitles it "static correction") a beeper goes off to warn. Much like, "hold my hand as we cross the street", "you'll shoot your eyes out", "I'm not gonna tell you again", "do as I say, OR ELSE"... Additionally, there are flags you place at the boundary to serve as reminders "huh uh." Much like the red flags of our own lives.

Empathetic friend decided "well, I suppose I should feel the 'static correction' (where the system zaps the hell out of you) so I'll know how my dog feels when it happens." I was there. It was hurt/good, funny ha ha, god awful. After I realized she still had a pulse, I laughed my ass off from her own yelping.

The whole thing, bizarre as it may seem, reminds me of life. Our grandparents perhaps lived with the settings at 45'. Ne'er straying too much, behaving, cooperating, the static correction put on full shock, yet - a good life. Our folks maybe pushed the boundaries back a little farther, occasionally put the lamp shade on, testing the waters of adulthood.

The 60's, we kinda maybe ruined it for all. "Put that sucker clear back to 90' in each direction." "Why?" "WHY NOT?". Free(er) rein, challenge authority, question anything, nonconformity.. "It's my life and I'll do what I want".

Nowadays, holy crap. Reality shows where folks joyfully run thru the shocking barriers. "Turn that sucker up to 10, let's see what it feels like!" Diversity has happened. Different 'schools'. Individuality. Some even flip the damn switch off, disappearing into what usedta be never-never land. Some purposely jihad into the static correction without any self-thought. Beep beep my ass.

Life's a good run. Different settings, different borders, barriers. Unique, in our own little (or big) circle. Shocking ain't it?

Love, Victurd.