Fathers.......

Stick an 'r' in there, and the definition goes farther. Yes, on this day we stop and think of our own fathers - and of course, I'm in that boat.

One paragraph (only), I promise:

My father was happy. Lived, without knowing so, as an example. Found humor where others might fret. A knack for making those around him feel comfortable. A tag team parent whose philosophy was "Well, if you wanted to do it, and we could afford it, and it wasn't hurtful to you - we were amenable." Always drove 5-10 miles under the speed limit (sister and I would clap if he ever passed a car on the ole' two lane highways), loved cooking, singing, and an occasional Budweiser. Loved acting, and continued that role in real life. Could/would tell a ten minute story, leaving you wondering "where is this going/is he making this up", glued to him, knowing full well he'd "gotten you" before - eventually closing with a long premeditated one sentence punchline - that on more than one occasion brought laughter, along with a sometime a "Oh sh%, Bud!", a smirk, and a look of wonderment.. (Got me again!) I miss him, and in a way (hopefully), he lives within.

Other fathers. As a kid, young adult, coworker, friend, teacher, coach, umpire/referee - I've been very fortunate to observe many wonderful fathers (And certain you feel this as well.) There is nothing like the father/daughter bond - witnessed by the many Father/Daughter Wedding dances posted on the internet. Proud. Father/Son, a game of catch, fishing, changing the plugs on an old Chevy, lessons of discipline, respect - and by example the right way to treat a woman.

"Our" era, the tail end of the mom at home, dad at work thing. Perhaps we took mom for granted - for attention always turned to pop when he eventually came home.

I love the pictures, remembrances, kind things people display - about their fathers. I love the way girls/women, say "Daddy" with the such affection. Daddies become grandpas, and allofasudden, relive. Had an uncle whom I never saw without him holding one of his granddaughters in his arms. The bond is passed on a generation.

Moms as dads. Along the way, I've witnessed all too many children having their father absent from the picture. Most, with little or no child support - '"fought the battle" admirably, and wonderfully picked up the slack in being both mom/dad, as well as breadwinner.

Too, grandkids without dads (and moms).. Being 61, I CANNOT imagine raising children, but witnessed many a grandparent who does/has - and without chagrin. Many different reasons, abandonment, death, immaturity....I have friends who were raised by their grandparents - and somehow their love is extra special between.

Non-blood 'fathers'. Teacher, coaches, bosses, clergymen, friend's fathers, neighbors, etc. People who have taken an interest in a child/youth's development - setting father-like examples along the way. You hear it often, "he was like a father to me."

While "Father's Day" is specific (and truly is), it's also much broader. Farther.

I am gonna go lay down for 15, 20 minutes - close my eyes..reflect.. and think, of course, about my own father.. but too about moms that were/are 'dads'.. grandpas (and grandmas) who unselfishly raised/are raising.. and the many father figures that have touched me in life's passings.

Happy Farther's Day. Love, Victurd.